The Real Amy Liddle

If you've been following my blog for any reasonable amount of time, you may notice that lately I've been a little restless with the layout, etc. So, in that spirit, I am also in the process of trying to add a few things and have updated my profile.

As I was doing that, I was thinking about all the different people I've "been" over the years (daughter, sister, wife, mother, etc.), it reminded me of an area in my life in which God has totally transformed me.

I'll start with this example:

When I was younger, growing up in a small town, I was always receiving compliments for the way I sang. (Please understand that this is not a boastful statement; instead it is a truthful one that is necessary to prove my point.)

As I grew up and continued singing, I kept receiving praise. Maybe too much praise, because over those formative years, even though I always had a desire to grow in my faith, I was unknowingly being held captive by something: my identity. You see, by the time I finished high school and entered college, my whole identity was wrapped up in who I was as a musician. In other words, I needed praise from people in regards to my music. I needed it so much that if i didn't have it, I felt completely defeated as a person. That is very unstable ground, my friends. Unfortunately, for people who have spent time in the spotlight, it is an easy trap to fall into.

I cannot say enough about God's patience with me. He never gave up on me. Even though I struggled in those areas, maybe He saw in me a heart that was seeking Him as much as it could. He gently brought me to the realization (though gentle is not always without pain) that I was not merely Amy the singer. He taught me that I was much more, created in His image, and that He wanted me to rest in that fact that I was simply...His.

Fast forward through several years and a lot of growing up....

These days, I still love making music. It is a gift that I choose to give back to God. But what's different about these days is that I don't need the praise of others to confirm that I have done that. I have learned that when I sing, God is "hearing" my heart. He knows when I am doing it for Him and when I am doing it for others. It matters to me what He thinks of me. I can rest in the fact that music is a part of who I am, but it is not who I am.

I could go on and on about other facets of my life that I have had (or am currently trying) to lay aside and then realize that I am simply...Amy: forgiven, loved and blameless because of Christ. And you know what? Because God cares enough for me to bring me around, I am also free.

Free from having to depend on others for my joy.

Free from having to worry about making a mistake.

Free to live my life according to what God brings my way, not according to others' expectations (although I would be lying if I said that I have perfected this!)

So, who am I?

Forgiven.

Loved.

Free.

His.

That's who I am.