Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Still Learning to Love

It would seem that a post on love would have been inspired by the fact that Valentine's Day is two days away.  But here is a post on love, and Valentine's Day has nothing to with it.  Rather, the inspiration for these thoughts comes from a conviction which has been placed upon my heart by the Holy Spirit.  He is teaching me about love.  What it is.  What it means.  How to do it.

You might think I would already know those things.  

But see, I had the children memorize 1 Corinthians 13!  I didn't want them to only hide it in their brains, but to learn to hide it in their hearts--to put it into practice!  What that meant for me was that I began to examine it a little more closely.  Guess what I realized?  I realized how often I fail when it comes to showing true love.

Ah, but Grace.  Praise God for His unfailing Love!

Back in October of 2009, little Evan was born.

This is one of my favorite pictures of him as a newborn.  During those first days with him, I wrote the following on my blog.  I felt it was appropriate enough to re-post today.  

~C. S. Lewis

I could have decided that my heart was too valuable. That it wasn't worth the risk. But because I didn't make that choice, my heart is wide open. Wide open for pain. Wide open to yearn. Wide open to be broken.

But more than that....

it's wide open for joy. Wide open for happiness. Wide open to love and be loved.

It's sometimes a scary thing to look at my children, or to watch my newborn, so helpless and dependent, and realize the depth of love that I have in my heart. It's scary because I know that it makes me vulnerable to the worst kind of pain. To love, is indeed, to give your heart away. But the joy in the journey far outweighs the pain of a loveless life.

To be in a place of feeling and vulnerablility is far better than the callous, cold "safety" of a guarded heart that refuses to love.

I still believe all of that.  Love can be a frightful thing!  I don't always do it well, but I am so grateful for a Heavenly Father who created love and knows it perfectly.  Because His Spirit dwells within me, I, through His strength, am enabled to love others according to His way.  

No, it isn't always easy.  And it really hurts sometimes.  But He is our Constant; we can always 




No comments :